... I'll trade it for rain any day.
*moans and groans* Take this headache away from me already! Its lasted a whole two days... isn't it enough? Haven't I been punished enough?
I was up to date with uni stuff for a whole ... wait for it... HALF A WEEK! *sighs* I need to get back into.. I really do but this headache is obviously not helping.
Okay it hurts way to much to blog.. therefore I think I shall retire to sleep soon.. and you all can imagine that I did actually write a lot more in this entry filled with complaints about headache, daily events, and more complaints about headache...
...did i mention I have a headache?
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
Saturday, July 28, 2007
Sharing the Laughs
After quite a long and effortful week of uni I'm glad the first week ended as it did. Okay, so not so long (my personal record of only 7 hours of class) ... and not so effortful (revolving around only the course outline). Anyway, not the the point. The point is, that my final class for the week, abnormal psychology, was really good. First of all, I didn't expect much from the class as abnormal it was a taught a bit dry and theoretical last year and the lecturer kinda looked a bit scary. But it was sooO good. Let me illustrate...
My lecturer was telling us a story of his previous visit to a psychiatric clinic. The story went sorta like this ... *note story is not exact quote.. just the gist of the storyline*
I went into the ward to visit one of my regular patients. I approached the patient and started the usual conversation.
Lecturer: "How are you today [insert name here]"?
Patient: *silent for a brief period.. stoic and seems to be staring off at a direction* "Good."
* The patient then proceeds so gently place his hand on the top of the Lecturer's arm, just slightly below the shoulder, and slightly push him to the left, while staring at the direction in which the Lecturer was previously standing*
Lecturer: *glances around the room* "Did you just see something?"
Patient: "Yes"
Lecturer: "What did you see?"
Patient: "Shit"
Lecturer: "Pardon?"
Patient: "There was shit drooping from the ceiling and I didn't want it to hit you"
(The Patient was hallucinating)
*** end of story***
Hehehehe The whole class, Nicole and I, Laughed so hard I think I snorted.. which made me laugh even more.
Other then that nothing interesting happened this week. Everyone's timetable seems to be so different to mine... I don't think I've had the chance to catch up with anyone, except Nicole. OO Nicole is back from the Eastern States. Its been good catching up with her, it seemed like ages since I hadn't talked to her and she has sooo many cool stories... heheh makes me wanna go too!
OOOOOOOOO AND MY STUPID UNI BOOKS!!!! Cost a frikken fortune! That money was intended at first to be for my phone.. then I decided that it would actually be put to buying the air ticket to Singapore and now its gone.. gone to buying those stupid boring uni books! ARRRGGGHH.. and I have to start saving all over again.
I think that's enough for today... until next time...
My lecturer was telling us a story of his previous visit to a psychiatric clinic. The story went sorta like this ... *note story is not exact quote.. just the gist of the storyline*
I went into the ward to visit one of my regular patients. I approached the patient and started the usual conversation.
Lecturer: "How are you today [insert name here]"?
Patient: *silent for a brief period.. stoic and seems to be staring off at a direction* "Good."
* The patient then proceeds so gently place his hand on the top of the Lecturer's arm, just slightly below the shoulder, and slightly push him to the left, while staring at the direction in which the Lecturer was previously standing*
Lecturer: *glances around the room* "Did you just see something?"
Patient: "Yes"
Lecturer: "What did you see?"
Patient: "Shit"
Lecturer: "Pardon?"
Patient: "There was shit drooping from the ceiling and I didn't want it to hit you"
(The Patient was hallucinating)
*** end of story***
Hehehehe The whole class, Nicole and I, Laughed so hard I think I snorted.. which made me laugh even more.
Other then that nothing interesting happened this week. Everyone's timetable seems to be so different to mine... I don't think I've had the chance to catch up with anyone, except Nicole. OO Nicole is back from the Eastern States. Its been good catching up with her, it seemed like ages since I hadn't talked to her and she has sooo many cool stories... heheh makes me wanna go too!
OOOOOOOOO AND MY STUPID UNI BOOKS!!!! Cost a frikken fortune! That money was intended at first to be for my phone.. then I decided that it would actually be put to buying the air ticket to Singapore and now its gone.. gone to buying those stupid boring uni books! ARRRGGGHH.. and I have to start saving all over again.
I think that's enough for today... until next time...
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
In the critical ward
.. You've accompanied me for so long already.. and today you decided to stop... what happened to you ... dear mp3 of mine. My mp3 seems to have died.. actually more like is in a coma, because the USB function still works. It just refuses to turn on. So I think it's going to the critical ward, awaiting surgery. Of all the time that it could stuff up.. it has to be when uni has finally started and when I will be bored sitting on the bus struggling with the nodding head syndrome that occurs after a crap day of uni.
After I opened it up for surgery... I didn't know what to do.. I'm not a doctor!
My YS Boots
Today I went out to settle the sushi craving I've been having. Who am I kidding.. I could never settle the sushi craving... LOVE sushi.. almost as much as KTV. hhehehe. I went out in my YS boots! And I tell ya they are certainly growing on me. The first time I physically saw them.. I didn't really like them. Actually, I was almost considering not wearing them... almost because they were a bit too pointy for my liking. BUT dude! They are really growing.. I'm really liking the white-ness of them. But they are a bit hard to keep clean. OO and it could be a bit more comfortable if they were half a size bigger. They fit perfectly, and not exactly tight.. but I think I could do with a bit more foot-room.
Okay.. so another day of uni tomorro.. I've only got classes from 10-12 on Wednesdays. This means. EARLY start.. oh NOOOO... but... I can't sleep tonite.. I know I can't sleep tonite. Why? well because I took an afternoon nap and somehow woke up at like 8:30pm. So its gonna be a long night.
Sunday, July 22, 2007
Stalkerism-ness
Today was actually are weird day at work... boring but weird at the same time.
For me, there are situations where someone walks past on the street and like everyone else on the street, they would regard me a stranger. Well, of course I'm a stranger coz really, they don't know me rite. But what if I know them? What if I know their name.. or something trivial in nature as that. Isn't it strange that people can identify you, people who really don't exist in your world?
I have been given two example of this today.. both at work too...
First, this guy Tony came in to order two Fried Kway Teows.. I know this order coz there was some argument over it. Anyway, naturally I was just someone working at the restaurant to him. But I recognised him from my high school days. You see, Tony was connect somehow to Amy or Caroline. C. and when they first met him.. there was some kinda of commotion. And I had seen pictures of him, heard the gossip surrounding him and maybe even met him quickly once but didn't really think anything of it. It was just a really weird situation, to know things about a person that don't know you. (Aside from the world of fandom.. thats another story in itself). I was kinda tempted to say to him " Hey, your Tony ******, rite?". But I of course refrained, in fear of sounding stalkerish.. but maybe I will one day.
Second example is this guy called Bryan, who went to our high school. Sheesh, another flash back into the past. He was I think a year older than us. But the reason I knew who he was, was because he was in the "target group". In year 10, after the year 12s had finished high school and were preparing to sit the exams, our group of girls decided to claim the right side of the canteen, that previously belonged to a group year 12. No biggie rite? After all, the year 12's had already gone and no longer needed a place to sit, chill and have lunch. But who knew.. we had entered into a war! We had to fight the year 11's for it. So after every period before break, we would fully rush everything and run to claim the spot. But somehow, at every single one of our attempts, we would be beaten by a member of the "target group". How? Why? .. well because we forgot that as a year 11 you get free periods. After a while we retreated bitterly, and claimed instead the left side of the canteen. But still then, the mini attacks did not end, with this Bryan guy throwing his rubbish towards our corner.. and us retaliating with trashing their corner. It got to the point where we were even considering putting super-gule on the seats of their corner.. but in the end could not be bothered. But the years went by and the "target group" eventually left. And in the end we kept the left side of the corner... up until the last day of school for us.. which was also coincidentally my birthday, where we passed on the corner to a year 10 group.
But yea, this Bryan guy came in to eat today. So weird..
For me, there are situations where someone walks past on the street and like everyone else on the street, they would regard me a stranger. Well, of course I'm a stranger coz really, they don't know me rite. But what if I know them? What if I know their name.. or something trivial in nature as that. Isn't it strange that people can identify you, people who really don't exist in your world?
I have been given two example of this today.. both at work too...
First, this guy Tony came in to order two Fried Kway Teows.. I know this order coz there was some argument over it. Anyway, naturally I was just someone working at the restaurant to him. But I recognised him from my high school days. You see, Tony was connect somehow to Amy or Caroline. C. and when they first met him.. there was some kinda of commotion. And I had seen pictures of him, heard the gossip surrounding him and maybe even met him quickly once but didn't really think anything of it. It was just a really weird situation, to know things about a person that don't know you. (Aside from the world of fandom.. thats another story in itself). I was kinda tempted to say to him " Hey, your Tony ******, rite?". But I of course refrained, in fear of sounding stalkerish.. but maybe I will one day.
Second example is this guy called Bryan, who went to our high school. Sheesh, another flash back into the past. He was I think a year older than us. But the reason I knew who he was, was because he was in the "target group". In year 10, after the year 12s had finished high school and were preparing to sit the exams, our group of girls decided to claim the right side of the canteen, that previously belonged to a group year 12. No biggie rite? After all, the year 12's had already gone and no longer needed a place to sit, chill and have lunch. But who knew.. we had entered into a war! We had to fight the year 11's for it. So after every period before break, we would fully rush everything and run to claim the spot. But somehow, at every single one of our attempts, we would be beaten by a member of the "target group". How? Why? .. well because we forgot that as a year 11 you get free periods. After a while we retreated bitterly, and claimed instead the left side of the canteen. But still then, the mini attacks did not end, with this Bryan guy throwing his rubbish towards our corner.. and us retaliating with trashing their corner. It got to the point where we were even considering putting super-gule on the seats of their corner.. but in the end could not be bothered. But the years went by and the "target group" eventually left. And in the end we kept the left side of the corner... up until the last day of school for us.. which was also coincidentally my birthday, where we passed on the corner to a year 10 group.
But yea, this Bryan guy came in to eat today. So weird..
Saturday, July 21, 2007
...Home Alone...
It feels so lonely being home on a Saturday nite when I know everyone else is out there partying for the last time before uni starts.
Its weird, the calmness and silence in my house, filling my room. Almost screaming at me..
And then I think, less than half an hour away, the line at Metro's must be starting extend out onto the road. Where the music is so loud, it drowns out the reality of your presence. Two worlds so different... Okay not gonna think about it.. its just gonna get me depressed.
So, its set.. I'm off to Singapore at the end of this year. I'm so close to booking the flights too. I'm going by Tiger, cheap flights and all yea?!? So far the date shall be the 20th of November, so straight after end of year exams I think. But not yet fully confirmed, as I must consider other factors and also discuss with Nicole who will be my wonderful official tour guide around Singapore. Singapore is not a new place for me. In fact I've been going to Singapore every few years since when I was young. But still it will be nice for a true Singaporean to show me how life is truly lived there and of course the brilliant night life that Lisa and I unfortunately missed last year. Anyone else in Singapore at that time.. meet ya there? hehehe. I am quite looking forward to it, so hopefully everything goes accordingly and no authoritative changes of minds occur.
hmm.. maybe a dose of Rain will cheer me up...
Post Note:
I Got my Yes-Style shopping today.. more on that another day.. maybe tomorro?
Its weird, the calmness and silence in my house, filling my room. Almost screaming at me..
And then I think, less than half an hour away, the line at Metro's must be starting extend out onto the road. Where the music is so loud, it drowns out the reality of your presence. Two worlds so different... Okay not gonna think about it.. its just gonna get me depressed.
So, its set.. I'm off to Singapore at the end of this year. I'm so close to booking the flights too. I'm going by Tiger, cheap flights and all yea?!? So far the date shall be the 20th of November, so straight after end of year exams I think. But not yet fully confirmed, as I must consider other factors and also discuss with Nicole who will be my wonderful official tour guide around Singapore. Singapore is not a new place for me. In fact I've been going to Singapore every few years since when I was young. But still it will be nice for a true Singaporean to show me how life is truly lived there and of course the brilliant night life that Lisa and I unfortunately missed last year. Anyone else in Singapore at that time.. meet ya there? hehehe. I am quite looking forward to it, so hopefully everything goes accordingly and no authoritative changes of minds occur.
hmm.. maybe a dose of Rain will cheer me up...
Post Note:
I Got my Yes-Style shopping today.. more on that another day.. maybe tomorro?
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
讓我唱歌給你聽: Let me sing U a song
YuPs... its like almost 3 am and I'm sitting in front of lappy... blogging =/
I can't sleep.
I've totally ruined my sleep schedule this holidays. Basically, if its not almost 4am then I won't be able to get to sleep. This means waking up at like 9...okay maybe 10 .. okay, okay.. I wake up when I get called into work ... sheesh I am way too honest.
Everyone gives us crap for KTV-ing too much. But after "in-depth" reflections.. u know what? In the WHOLE of this holidays I have only KTV-ed 3 times!! That's not even once a week! But even so.. I don't mind the crap I guess. Coz it's true, I LOVE KTV ... so there!
Speaking of KTV and singer, I've just realised ho many good Malaysian singers/idols are out there. Those who never made in big in Malaysia until they pursued their careers in Taiwan (My future home ^-^). Eg ZChen, Wu Chun and Nicholas Teo. ehehhe and Nicholas is KuChing-ian... He's not brilliant but an okay singer and cool actor.
Which reminds me.. I finished 'Smiling Pasta'. Actually I finished it in 2-3days. Its actually a lot better than I thought it would be. Then again I had been told by countless people that it was crap. But in my opinion I think it was pretty good, not so original.. but I think it was at least as good as 'Corner with Love'. It was a feel good drama, where you can associate with the main actress (Cyndi Wang) and come to appreciate the small things in life that make you smile. I particularly liked her attitude towards situations and her idea of "只要笑一笑, 沒什麼事情過不了". 
This was my last Drama for the holidays. The last one I own until I go hunting for more. Which means I need to go OVERSEAS yea yeA YEA?!?!
Hehhe I was planning to somehow sneak back to Singapore this year.. just to get my new fone and all. Which by the way I think I kinda have found one I like.. but have to get it overseas to have the Chinese input function. Its a Sony Ericsson slide phone. Presenting... S500i
Still considering and shopping for any better alternatives. What do U guys think? Yes? No?
CAROLINE is back! YaY-ness. With the awesomest stories. Making me wanna replace the sneak to Singapore to sneak to ShangHai and China.
hehehe I really wish I could go aye...
~Off to Dreamland~
*side note*
Uni Starts next week... just when I was slowly begining to lose my black eye bags...damn!
Saturday, July 14, 2007
A Cold Night
ARRRRGGGGHHHHHH!!!!! I was informed by Lisa the other day, that my Yes-Style top-thingy was out of stock and cancelled!! *cires* Actually.. this has happened before to Lisa.. so now I fully fully feel your pain!
Was out just before KTV-ing. Was a good and much needed breather from the mundane world that is my life. Minus the crazy scary people in Russel's Square! ooO and Thanks our bodyguards Alistair and Edmond.
I had more to say.. but.. I can't seem to say it the way I want to... quite frustrating really.. So I guess i'll just submerge into endless hours of YouTubing before I can finally fall asleep without my thoughts taking over me.
Was out just before KTV-ing. Was a good and much needed breather from the mundane world that is my life. Minus the crazy scary people in Russel's Square! ooO and Thanks our bodyguards Alistair and Edmond.
I had more to say.. but.. I can't seem to say it the way I want to... quite frustrating really.. So I guess i'll just submerge into endless hours of YouTubing before I can finally fall asleep without my thoughts taking over me.
Thursday, July 12, 2007
Speechless
北极星的眼泪 – Tears from Polaris
Artist: 张栋梁- Nicholas Teo (Zhang Dong Liang)
像断了线 消失人海里面
Xiang duan le xian xiao shi ren hai li mian
Like a broken piece of string that has disappeared in a sea of people
我的眼终于失去 你的脸
Wo de yan zhong yu shi qu ni de lian
My eyes have finally lost sight of your face
再等一会 奢望流星会出现
Zai deng yi hui she wang liu xing hui chu xian
Just wait a while desperately waiting for a shooting star to appear
愿 如果真的实现
Yuan ru guo zhen de shi xian
If wishes really do come true
爱能不能永远
Ai neng bu neng yong yuan
Can love really be forever?
明天 或许来不及变
Ming tian huo xu lai bu ji bian
Tomorrow's change may come too late
但曾经走过的昨天 越来越远
Dan ceng jing zou guo de zuo tian yue lai yue yuan
But the memories of our shared history grows dimmer by the day
* 北极星的眼泪 说不出的想念
* bei ji xing de yan lei shuo bu chu de xiang nian
* Tears from Polaris, thoughts that are unspoken
原来我们活在 两个世界
Yuan lai wo men huo zai liang ge shi jie
For we live two separate worlds apart
北极星的眼泪 你哭红的双眼
Bei ji xing de yan lei ni ku hong de shuang yan
Tears of Polaris, your eyes are red from crying
被淋湿的诺言 淹没在心里面
Bei ling shi de nuo yan yan mo zai xin li mian
Drenched promises are submerged in my heart
我抬头看着 爱不见
Wo tai tou kan zhe ai bu jian
I raise my head and find that the love has gone
再等一会 奢望流星会出现
Zai deng yi hui she wang liu xing hui chu xian
Wait a while and a shooting star shall appear
愿 如果真的实现
Yuan ru guo zhen de shi xian
If wishes really do come true
爱能不能永远
Ai neng bu neng yong yuan
Can love really be forever?
明天 或许来不及变
Ming tian huo xu lai bu ji bian
Tomorrow's change may come too late
但曾经走过的昨天 越来越远
Dan ceng jing zou guo de zuo tian yue lai yue yuan
But the memories of our shared history grows dimmer by the day
Repeat *
当对的人 等不到对的时间
Dang dui de ren deng bu dao dui de shi jian
With the right person yet cannot find the right time
就在放开手的瞬间 爱撕成两边
Jiu zai fang kai shou de shun jian, ai si cheng liang bian
In the instant when our hands separate, the love that we share is torn in two
Repeat *
整个宇宙都 流眼泪
Zheng ge yu zhou dou liu yan lei
The whole universe is shedding tears
Credits to Shez from Chinese Music Blog Forum
I think what I like about this song the most is its lyrics... polaris tears.. seems so poetic.
Yea, its from the Taiwanese Drama 'Smiling Pasta'. This drama so far is quite good, with the exception being the obvious editing of particular scenes =/
I suddenly feel a wind of insignificance sweep over me...
Artist: 张栋梁- Nicholas Teo (Zhang Dong Liang)
像断了线 消失人海里面
Xiang duan le xian xiao shi ren hai li mian
Like a broken piece of string that has disappeared in a sea of people
我的眼终于失去 你的脸
Wo de yan zhong yu shi qu ni de lian
My eyes have finally lost sight of your face
再等一会 奢望流星会出现
Zai deng yi hui she wang liu xing hui chu xian
Just wait a while desperately waiting for a shooting star to appear
愿 如果真的实现
Yuan ru guo zhen de shi xian
If wishes really do come true
爱能不能永远
Ai neng bu neng yong yuan
Can love really be forever?
明天 或许来不及变
Ming tian huo xu lai bu ji bian
Tomorrow's change may come too late
但曾经走过的昨天 越来越远
Dan ceng jing zou guo de zuo tian yue lai yue yuan
But the memories of our shared history grows dimmer by the day
* 北极星的眼泪 说不出的想念
* bei ji xing de yan lei shuo bu chu de xiang nian
* Tears from Polaris, thoughts that are unspoken
原来我们活在 两个世界
Yuan lai wo men huo zai liang ge shi jie
For we live two separate worlds apart
北极星的眼泪 你哭红的双眼
Bei ji xing de yan lei ni ku hong de shuang yan
Tears of Polaris, your eyes are red from crying
被淋湿的诺言 淹没在心里面
Bei ling shi de nuo yan yan mo zai xin li mian
Drenched promises are submerged in my heart
我抬头看着 爱不见
Wo tai tou kan zhe ai bu jian
I raise my head and find that the love has gone
再等一会 奢望流星会出现
Zai deng yi hui she wang liu xing hui chu xian
Wait a while and a shooting star shall appear
愿 如果真的实现
Yuan ru guo zhen de shi xian
If wishes really do come true
爱能不能永远
Ai neng bu neng yong yuan
Can love really be forever?
明天 或许来不及变
Ming tian huo xu lai bu ji bian
Tomorrow's change may come too late
但曾经走过的昨天 越来越远
Dan ceng jing zou guo de zuo tian yue lai yue yuan
But the memories of our shared history grows dimmer by the day
Repeat *
当对的人 等不到对的时间
Dang dui de ren deng bu dao dui de shi jian
With the right person yet cannot find the right time
就在放开手的瞬间 爱撕成两边
Jiu zai fang kai shou de shun jian, ai si cheng liang bian
In the instant when our hands separate, the love that we share is torn in two
Repeat *
整个宇宙都 流眼泪
Zheng ge yu zhou dou liu yan lei
The whole universe is shedding tears
Credits to Shez from Chinese Music Blog Forum
I think what I like about this song the most is its lyrics... polaris tears.. seems so poetic.
Yea, its from the Taiwanese Drama 'Smiling Pasta'. This drama so far is quite good, with the exception being the obvious editing of particular scenes =/
I suddenly feel a wind of insignificance sweep over me...
Monday, July 9, 2007
Judgment Day
...
Results come out today.
I haven't yet worked up the guts to go check them. Its been nagging at the back of my mind ever since the last exam I sat. I know I said that I wouldn't think about it this holidays.. but yea.. its been nagging me.
I remember the day that the TEE results came out. Well technically they came out before I realised they could be accessed.. but I remember the moment in front of the computer.
I had just come home from a day out with the girls, when Ashleigh asked me about my TER.. I was clueless about the fact they they had been out.. but I immediately felt a rush of fear come across me.. a mixture of fear and anticipation. 12 years of hard work in high school.. 12 years of pushing myself to focus.. came down to that one moment.
As previously planned, I called up Canh and told her about the fact that the results were up.. we were going to check the results at the same time..
We logged in... and I waited.. while the computer loaded.. bits of the screen appeared before my eyes. We were silent..
My screen finished loading first.. and then it appeared... the number that would scar me.. well at that time I would we would be forever branded by that one score.. a number that would forever haunt me. Once I saw that number... I immediately cried... I cried and cried.. all day. My parents weren't home and it was just my sisters. They tried so hard but I just couldn't stop the tears. After getting off the phone with Canh (who was also disappointed) I stayed in my room and sat there.. as if the room had lost all colour. I didn't do THAT badly.. I know a lot of people out there would think I'm stupid and would have loved to get what I got.. but it was about my expectation of myself. Perhaps it was because it was my only goal for the whole of high school.. It was what got me through high school.. knowing I had a goal and having to strive and constantly push myself to achieve it.. to not give up... and when I didn't get anywhere near my target.. Just shattered. But after a few hours, I finally snapped out of my autistic fit and plonked myself in front of the TV. Trying to drown it all out.. all the thoughts.. trying to allow it all to fade away.
When my parents came home... the tears started up again. I felt as if I let them down. Although academically, my parents have never expected anything from me.. I felt as if I let them down.
...
Its almost been three years since then, and that number (which I still hate to this day) hasn't really affected me. Sure, in the first few months of first year uni, it was a hot topic when first meeting people... but after that it hasn't really been mentioned (cept in the Asian gossip community.. I'm sure a lot of u out there understand wat I mean). At the end of the day.. I still made it didn't I?
So, I've planned to keep this in my mind when I check this semester's results. After all said and done.. I might get upset about my results, but there are other things more important. Right? I need affirmation! hehehe
hehehe I say this now.. but lets see what happens after I see the results. Ok.. *big sigh* ... off to see the judgment
Good Luck with your results everyone =)
Results come out today.
I haven't yet worked up the guts to go check them. Its been nagging at the back of my mind ever since the last exam I sat. I know I said that I wouldn't think about it this holidays.. but yea.. its been nagging me.
I remember the day that the TEE results came out. Well technically they came out before I realised they could be accessed.. but I remember the moment in front of the computer.
I had just come home from a day out with the girls, when Ashleigh asked me about my TER.. I was clueless about the fact they they had been out.. but I immediately felt a rush of fear come across me.. a mixture of fear and anticipation. 12 years of hard work in high school.. 12 years of pushing myself to focus.. came down to that one moment.
As previously planned, I called up Canh and told her about the fact that the results were up.. we were going to check the results at the same time..
We logged in... and I waited.. while the computer loaded.. bits of the screen appeared before my eyes. We were silent..
My screen finished loading first.. and then it appeared... the number that would scar me.. well at that time I would we would be forever branded by that one score.. a number that would forever haunt me. Once I saw that number... I immediately cried... I cried and cried.. all day. My parents weren't home and it was just my sisters. They tried so hard but I just couldn't stop the tears. After getting off the phone with Canh (who was also disappointed) I stayed in my room and sat there.. as if the room had lost all colour. I didn't do THAT badly.. I know a lot of people out there would think I'm stupid and would have loved to get what I got.. but it was about my expectation of myself. Perhaps it was because it was my only goal for the whole of high school.. It was what got me through high school.. knowing I had a goal and having to strive and constantly push myself to achieve it.. to not give up... and when I didn't get anywhere near my target.. Just shattered. But after a few hours, I finally snapped out of my autistic fit and plonked myself in front of the TV. Trying to drown it all out.. all the thoughts.. trying to allow it all to fade away.
When my parents came home... the tears started up again. I felt as if I let them down. Although academically, my parents have never expected anything from me.. I felt as if I let them down.
...
Its almost been three years since then, and that number (which I still hate to this day) hasn't really affected me. Sure, in the first few months of first year uni, it was a hot topic when first meeting people... but after that it hasn't really been mentioned (cept in the Asian gossip community.. I'm sure a lot of u out there understand wat I mean). At the end of the day.. I still made it didn't I?
So, I've planned to keep this in my mind when I check this semester's results. After all said and done.. I might get upset about my results, but there are other things more important. Right? I need affirmation! hehehe
hehehe I say this now.. but lets see what happens after I see the results. Ok.. *big sigh* ... off to see the judgment
Good Luck with your results everyone =)
Sunday, July 1, 2007
Dramas in my Life
當你眼淚忍不住要流出來的時候, 如果能倒立起來, 這樣原本要流出來的淚就流不出來了…
你學會了嗎?
你學會了嗎?
heehhe.. I bet the title made you all look and gasp and jump.. "gossip..gossip..where..where" but sorry.. misleading! >.<
Yesterday, me and my little sister were playing another one of our lame games while cleaning up after a hard day's work. Basically we were trying to see who could name the most opening songs from Dramas. I struggled.. especially since I had to keep my title and my pride.. dude.. this is DRAMAs I'm talkin about!
My saving grace... as always... Zai Zai.. in Silence and the the opening song "Jing Jing de" sung by Harlem. But in the midst of our lame-ness we stumbled on a few dramas whose openings we both couldn't think of. So when we jetted off home, my lil sister decided to check them out. Hehhe one of the dramas being Poor Prince. How Zai Zai has improved. I really admire he's dedication to the arts and you can see that he has really grown as a person. He was thrown into the lime-light and guess what.. he survived.. I always knew he would.
I Take it back Mishie.. but I think you knew all along
Oh and I finished Corner with Love a while ago now.. I shall do a review on it another day..
OOoO and the results of our cam whoring the other nite... DAMN SHAMEFUL!! Most of them didn't turn out well.. too dark.. but there were a few okay ones..
... Yours Truly...
... Mishie ...
.. the (hahaha) "group" ones didn't turn out too good...Must totally make up for it!
****
Today's weather was a bit gloomy wasn't it.. hehe just the way I like it.. minus the wind on a day I stupidly chose to wear a skirt.
Hehehe.. I know.. I know.. I'm Lame.. But U guys love me neways LOL =P
Had Jaws today with Hadi .. and did some more spending.. Yups.. definitely feeling the broke-ness. It was good tho. I Haven't caught up with her in a while.
Tis a good feeling to be done exams (sorry Alan couldn't help but rub it in) but I really wanna make an effort next semester.. make an effort to get where I wanna be.. and slowly cut back on the stress and emo-ness. AwwwW.. TV how I have missed you so
OKay uploading pics is really a bum coz I keep deleting them accidentally.. so I think i'm done for tonite..
Annyonghi Kyeseyo... Laters =)
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