Haru Haru

I stare at my monthly planner on the wall.. in big red letter is reads THESIS: introduction and method first draft due, 30th July. It’s achievable. If I make the effort. Which I must.

But .. and yes there always must be a but .. my brain won't function. I need a delete button.. to delete all that was. haha but life is never that easy is it. I'm tired. I'm tired of thinking about the alternative roads. This is not how it played out in reality.. so why does it play out like that in my head? Why did I imagine myself like that? When in actuality I pretty much did the opposite? Is it my subconscious leaking into my conscious thoughts? ... all I really want to know is why. Questions that will never be answered.

Last night I had a session with Mishie and a few coronas. It was a chilled night. But it was a good night. Met a few new people too.. Its always good to expose yourself to new perspectives. So much for MIA right? I always say I want it.. Then when faced with it I get worried. Still going to say it tho.. cos who is going to stop me? You?

下雨天 ... 陪我的雨滴