Caffeine Overdose

I have been caffeine-free for a long time now, opting for hot chocolates and fruity frappes whenever I'm out to coffee with friends. It has been the sensible choice since I know that milk and caffeine does not do me any good with my urges to puke. But today... I have no idea what has come over me... I have had 2 coffees within 4 hours and I FEEL SICK! Bleh, I think I've learnt my lesson... I think back to no caffeine at least until HK when I go all out for milk tea =p

Soooo... the new year is approaching. Everyone got plans? Noelle has no plans, then again I don't think I ever do.. things just come up and I just go along with it every year. Then again Christmas and New Year's Day has never been a big thing for me. At least not since I can remember. Just another day in the year. Hmm resolutions this year? Still thinking.. still working on it. But I can tell u one thing, 2009 is the year of Taiwan...

I wonder where everyone is? Or is it just me? Everyone seems preoccupied with stuff and busy. No one is ever on msn nemore. Otherwise everyone is hiding like me. Maybe that's it. Or maybe its just that people have lives to live.

I think I need a change in styles. I'm kinda bored with my look. But at the end of the day I still buy clothes that are similar to what i've already got. Maybe I'll have to experiment a bit more with the clothes I buy on my shopping trip overseas. So far on my list... I want a nice watch something that is elegant. But I guess we shall see coz rite now I am still as broke as ever. Speaking of clothes, that reminds me I need to really clean out my closet. Need to get rid of the stuff I no longer wear and no longer want. I have a habit of keeping stuff even if I will never wear it ever again. But seriously that has to change coz my closet is full of junk. But but but I cleaned my room -ish... well it's been de-dusted and the carpet has been professionally cleaned, so that is my spring cleaning for the year (and i mean next year of course).

Am heading to HK and Macau quite soon. Anyone have any suggestions on must go destinations? At the moment I have no idea where to go, what to eat (other than the famous egg tarts) and where to shop. I guess I still have time to do some research, but lets just see if I can be bothered. I'm guessing no.

Ok I am off... coffee is still making me jittery so lets see if i can find something to overcome it. mmmM fine dining tomorro should be good. oh and fotos. I miss Camwhoring.

A Nice End

Yesterday was the last day of my internship with Deloitte. What can I say really... after working there for 3 weeks I have become so attached to the place and the people there. I know I was only there for such a short time, and yet these people seem so comfortable. I am seriously going to miss them all; both my fellow vaccies and my team.

Yesterday started off with breakfast at the Platform with my buddy. It was soo good the hashbrown omg soooooo yummy. mMmm hashbrown. I actually really like the Platform, the food is good and the atmosphere is quite chilled. Maybe I'm biased because that breakky was so awesome and it was expensed to the company as a "buddy catch-up" session.

So the rest of the day was pretty much spent on practising for our presentation and working out the props and scripts to perfection. I reckon my team works really well... we draw on inspiration from each other and just like that we get the work done and laugh our heads off at the same time. I definitely got the best group. We were the only ones to actually do the presentation live as well... everyone else made videos. So on that note I think ours was the best :) but once again I am biased!

After all the presentations and the admin stuff we all headed to the breakout room of the office for drinks. Was very relaxed and I got to talk to some of the people that I didn't really get much time to socialise with before. Mainly people from the other service line streams. It was quite cool. I wish I kinda talked to the actual employees more *shrugs*.

Anyway so we stayed in the office till about 6 and then everyone was starting to get hungry. Oh and we met a DJ that works in Deloitte. He is so nice and friendly. We were all gonna go for dinner.. but he was going to be late for work so we went to box deli and he bought us all a round of butterscotch snapps before he left. Was an awesome choice of a drink! We then had a round of Jagers as we waited for some of the guys to finish with the food they ordered. And then somehow instead of eating dinner we ended up at 1907 to continue with the drinks. I was already tipsy by then so I insisted on not drinking for a while for at least until I sobered up a bit. After a few moments they all noticed I has stopped drinking, and because peer pressure works on me to a certain extent I went to get a drink. Actually Nic bought me a drink. Not knowing what to get Nic suggested we do martinies since we hadn't tried it b4. So I had the smokey Martini and Nic ended getting Johnny Walker with something 0_O so much for the martinies!! BUT OMG IT WAS SOOOO STRONG. It tasted like smoked water.. very weird. And no doubt about it, it left me weak at the knees. Was definitely very tipsy by then. I said TIPSY not drunk ok!

After that Al told me that Eryn would be picking us up to get to a Christmas party one of my team members were holding. So we trekked back to the office, and Al packed up his stuff and made our way to the party. It was just the main team so it was good to be able to sit there and enjoy their company. Especially since I don't know if I will be seeing them again in the future. They are so hilarious and made me laugh so much that my cheeks hurt! Had champagne there, it was very nice champers too. I am going to miss them.

Mishie dearest offered to take me home that night. Thankyou Mishie :). I didn't drive that nite because I don't usually drive to work and I actually wasn't intending to stay out so late. I'm glad I did tho. I had a truly awesome nite and It was defiantly a nice end to my internship. Oh and of course not to forget the Korean supper we had after Mishie picked me up. Was good :). Damn I realised now I should have took fotos. That would have been so much better... *sighs* what a day.

Anyways I think its time to stop yabbering. This post has been a bit messy and unorganised so sorry about that, but I really wanted to mark this day down just cos I had so much fun.

Lasty if I get one more spam message on my chatterbox I'm going to cry!!

Without you

I've been thinking about Taiwan a lot lately. It is actually really not all that far away. It is no longer a distant dream, but a serious possibility. I actually cannot remember how long I've been raving about Taiwan ... must have been at least half a decade. It is almost to the extent where being there almost seems natural, normal and expected of me. But the thing is... the closer the dream comes to becoming reality the more scared I am. Growing up in such a loud family, and being surrounded by people most of the time has become a habit, a sense of security and a necessity. I'm scared of silence. Scared of being alone. I'm not quite sure how Taiwan will work anymore. My once photographic vision has now become a blur. No this does not mean I have changed my mind. I still want Taiwan... I still want to be there... to experience it's entirety... I just wonder can I do it alone? Will I be able to sleep at night? Will I still want to stay there when I have no one? Will I become a forgotten soul?

A New Chapter to Life

What am I doing sitting here blogging at 2.30am in ther morning. No idea. Well.. just got home from Metros. Yeah I know I thought I was banned too. But with te help of my sister I got to go. Jie Jie came with me which was good cos I never get to club with her. Plus it was free entry.. JUST made it.. too a bit of running in my heels tho! Clubbing was actually fun.. i guess mainly cos its been a while and the girls were there Caz, Yang and Mishie .. and my sister of course. All in all a good nite out.. good and much needed I must say.

So why the lack of updates recently? Well.. I've been meaning to blog but just couldnt find the time and lacked the effort. Last Monday I started Vaction work, the new chapter to my life. And the verdict--> I LOVE IT!!!. Ok not working ife in itself.. but my team, my project, the company, the office, the people. Everything is so less scary then I thought it would be and the people are omg soo friendly and helpful. But that put to one side. My client atm is Murdoch University... so like its really far away from me. Which means I have to get up heaps early in order to make it in to office on time.. 6am wake ups are just crazy.. and also it means I get home quite late. Basically its a wake up, work, home, eat and immediately sleep schedule cos even if i wanted to stay up my body and mind refuses. But I still think its good. Especially when i get an email from my project supervior saying " great job and thanks for the help". It is all worth it =)

I havent camwhored in my business clothes yet... mainly because suprisingly camwhoring dosnt work at 6am in the morning. But on that note I need more business clothes! I have nothing to wear. *sighs* I missed like 5 of Canh's calls yesterday and I haven't had the chance to call her back yet. Its been ages since I've had my sesssion with Canh. I wonder how she is.

Well.. with a busy week ahead and and event filled day tomorro I think it is finally bed time.. I hope I'm not getting back into my 3am sleeping habits. But then again my current 9pm sleeping habits arent good either =/

Laters guys,
Hope everyone is well =)

无聊

It's funny how even after I have finished the pain of uni for the year I am still stressing/comtemplating/depressed over something in my life. Ok so not so funny and more just a natural emo.

Wasn't going to blog today, but I thought I just mite.. maybe it will help me clear my head a bit?I've been going through all my old emails again. I know I know we shouldn't dwell in the past. But I just can't help but look back to what it all used to be. hehe there are some awesomely hilarious emails in there... ones of me slowly growing my fondness of micky-shi, and then there are plans ... lots of plans... and lastly there are those emails.. the ones that make me miss everything and want to shed a tear.

Someone need to hit me over the head with a brick and remind me that change is not only inevitable.. its not so much of a bad thing. We all go thru it rite... its all just a matter of time. Maybe I've been watching too much dramas again recently. I think watching those dramas just make me depressed... watching a life I crave, a dream I no longer dare to want.

Happy Birthday Mishie

Went shopping today.. (and yesterday) with Mishie (HAPPY 21st BIRTHDAY again) and ali joined for a bit. And I found nothing in the city on both days. Meant to be shopping for office-wear. In the end I went home picked up mummy and she helped me find some stuff. Bought 2 skirts and a top. Just plain stuff but I guess its ok... We shall have to see, I will prob do some more shopping later on.

Soo tired.. I think its time to sleep. Goodnite all.

Blue Skies

Finally. I think that one word says a lot about what I feel. Now that I am free it seems that the blue skies have come out and the world seems somewhat brighter. My shoulders don't seem heavy and full of burden. And my mind is clear.. clear and free from the insecurities within.

In the space of these two days I think everyone is leaving. Off to play in a different playground. Its sad that I haven't got the chance to fully catch up with them all before they leave but such is life rite?? Plus they will be back. Cept that fact that the day Lisa comes home.. I shall be flying off so we will be missing each other this whole holiday. But anyways have fun everyone.. and I am wishing a safe trip to Lisa, Ed, RongChyi and Anthony who are all either leaving today or tomorrow.

I dare not say i'm bored. I won't do it. I still have the scars of yesterday so fresh. So rather I will say that I wanna go out to play. I kinda still miss dressing up and looking semi-pretty. hehe but the only problem now is that everyone will be gone :( I guess that mean more time in front of lappy?

I shall be starting the internship in about one week's time. AND I AM SCARED. In a good way tho. I really want to try my best and show that I am competent. I hope that they will like me and that I will make friends. I think i'm one of those difficult people to get to know and be friends with. I think it takes a lot of patience to actually get to know me because I dont think I open up to people very easily.

Gah ok.. sorry this was a boring post.
I'm off to work
Laters.. admire the blue skies everyone

Darker days...

Exam stress has really gotten to me again these days. My head is constantly hurting and so are my eyes. This season is so depressing. So much so that I don't eat properly anymore.. and I can feel the physical deterioration and yet I don't feel like eating. Classifying clinical depression on the DSM IV. I think perhaps is because the sun is shining outside and yet I can't see the light. I know, I know.. I don't have it that bad, I know that there is only less then one week left and I know that I'm probably over exaggerating. But knowing all these things don't help.. not at all.. because I start to wonder what is wrong with me and why can't I deal with all this when others just take in in their stride.

This semester has started me questioning my abilities to do honours. If I can't cope now... what makes me think that I could ever survive honours.

I'm scared... Scared in my world of isolation... waiting for the skies to clear again.